The other day, I decided to clean up my living room and dining table. Paper and other things sat on my dining table as an eyesore for so long. I decided that if I touched that, I had to decide to toss or keep it. It had to serve a purpose or bring value to my life immediately, or else I had to discard it. Ironically, some papers have started to pile up to my right, so let me discard them, and then I will get back to you.
Back, I washed a few dishes and put some clothes away. Now, back to my point! I forgot what it was, but I discovered something new. Last week, a friend of mine was killed by her husband. We had recently had conversations about life and our dreams, so I felt cheated when God called her home. I do not think I can be the same person I was, but it might be for the best. Her death killed some parts of me. It is kind of like discarding some of the things that were on the table. I might have incidentally discarded some items I could use, but overall, I got rid of things I did not need. Parts of me needed to be killed off. I once believed in love and the possibility of finding the one true other half of me. Maybe she was the other half, and I will never get another chance, but I know life is not the same. My Playstation has been disconnected for about three days or more, and I have not missed it. I enjoy hearing my thoughts and reflecting on life and my day. Thoughts of her and the last time I saw her run through my mind and create an absence; I smile every time I think of her saying, "Ronnie." Her voice and presence always soothed me. My eyes swell, and my heart aches whenever I realize the last time was the last.
My Thoughts: Let your emotions be in line with your actions.